The eagerly awaited premiere of American Idol Season: Divas Gone Wild was a fizzle. Based on the pre-show publicity that included death threats, beefed up security and confessionals to Barbra Walters we were expecting some bitch-slappin’ and wig-pullin’ from Idol’s newest judges, Mariah Carey and Nicki Minaj. All we got was some inane argument about who knew the movie Mean Girls better. (Show spoiler – it was Mariah) Setting aside the hype Mariah and Nicki were interesting to watch because you always sensed the two were on the edge of an all out war.
The biggest surprise to me was Nicki Minaj. Nicki gives off the air she’s all bad ass, but when it comes down to it she’s pretty sweet. Case and Point: Idol has a tried–and–true gimmick during audition week of putting up delusional kids with no talent on TV for ridicule. It’s actually quite cruel, especially when the contestant is only 15. Last night 15 year-old James Bae gave his attempt at a Justin Bieber song:
Of course, he was bad. Randy in a very condescending way said, “the vocals were bad, don’t sing.” Randy, as always, comes off as a douche-bag. On the other hand, Nicki was quite kind, clearly sensing he was sad, she gave him a pep talking saying he was “special” and “brave” then gave him a hug. Very classy Nicki!
We all like snarky–but saying the vocals are bad isn’t snarky, isn’t interesting, isn’t really anything except rude. it’s rude especially when the kid is only 15. It’s ok to be snarky when the contestant is old enough to know better. Take, for example, 21 year-old Benjamin Gaisey, who looked like Cee-lo Green stuffed into a red latex condom. Check it out:
His outfit was actually more in tune than he was-did you all here the outfit squeaking with his every gyration? The singing was so bad he couldn’t even get a part in Les Mis. Yikes! If you want to snarky there’s a funny way to do it, as appose to Randy’s comment: “the voice is terrible.” Is that really an astute observation! A 2 year-old could have said that.
No wonder Randy, who’s been with the show from the beginning is the lowest paid talent. It might also explain why Idol made Randy take a ferry to Staten Island to give a contest winner a free pass to the auditions. If you were a real talent Idol would have sent you in a limo–there are actually bridges to Staten Island.
So we talked about Mariah, Nicki and Randy, who am I forgetting? Oh! Keith Urban. The only thing I knew about him is that he is married to Nicole Kidman and sang country music. Last night I learned he has an Australian accent. This is gonna sound so American, but who knew Australians sang country? Did you? Anyways now I know three too many things about Keith Urban–he was a bore.
All in all I’m in so far for this season of Idol. It was a sold first show that interested me enough to come back for another week. Although Mariah and Nicki didn’t yet live up to the hype, they were interesting and have the potential to be the best celebrity judges Idol ever had.