Rex Reed Has A Boner for Jason Bateman

Jason Bateman Melissa McCarthy

I’m pretty sure Rex Reed has a major hard-on for Jason Bateman. The New York Observer film critic rips apart Bateman’s new movie Identity Thief co-starring, as Reed puts it, “tractor-sized Melissa McCarthy.” That’s pretty offensive! Reed goes on like a woman scored referring to McCarthy’s character as a “humongous creep” and a “female hippo.” It’s not just McCarthy’s role in this movie Reed doesn’t like he referees to her as “a gimmick comedian who has devoted her short career to being obese and obnoxious with equal success.” All the while he gushes over Bateman like a school-girl. Reed is befuddled why such a “bankable” star like Bateman who’s “so charming, talented, attractive and versatile get stuck in so much dreck (a.k.a ‘trash’ for less hoity-toity).”

Is Bateman that attractive? He’s a decent looking guy, but I’m pretty sure he wasn’t the first choice or even considered for Magic Mike. Is Bateman that bankable? Wasn’t he in the box office bomb The Change-Up with Ryan Reynolds that only grossed $37 million. Somethings fishy here. About half way through the review I think we can discern Reed’s true motivations, he refers to a sex scene between McCarthy and Bateman as “grotesque.” Clearly Reed wants to be at the receiving end of Bateman’s lovin’. The review is reminiscent of a scorned lover not your typical cranky old movie reviewer. 

Rex Reed

Rex Reed

Somewhere in his murky review Reed might have a point. McCarthy’s role in Identity Thief was probably recycled from her Oscar nominated role in Bridesmaids–Hollywood tends to be unoriginal. So one might get the idea McCarthy’s a one trick pony. But before McCarthy took off she was in a short-lived TV show called Samantha Who where she played the quirky obsessed friend of Christian Applegate’s character. McCarthy was brilliant in it and I’ve been a big fan of hers ever since. So Rex Reed needs to keep busy pleasuring himself to his box set of Arrested Development and leave Melissa McCarthy alone.

 

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